Literacy Writing Prompt for 2-18-11

What have you learned about your buddy’s needs, abilities and interests?
Interests
My fourth grade buddy loves to play football at recess. He also likes the Seahawks, soccer, scary and mystery books, fast cars (Ferrari, Lamborghini), and playing video games (World of War Craft). His favorite color is purple. One of his goals is to read more at home instead of playing video games. He said it is hard for him to find a book of interest at home and there is limited resources. My partner and I find our fourth grade buddy very sweet to work with; we are curious to know why his desk is right next to the his teacher's instead of with a group?
Abilities and Needs
- When my partner and I did the spelling assessment, he really enjoyed spelling. When we had time left in out next sessions, he would always want to wrap up with some spelling. Words ending in “ed,” long vowel, other vowel patterns, consonant doubling, inflected endings, and syllable junctures are learning targets of focus. I would place this writer in the Within Word Pattern and Syllables and Affixes spelling stages (Bear & Templeton, 2004).
- During the word bank exercise, this student did well, read the words fairly quickly, and finished all the words. He self-monitored when he did not know the word and attempted to sound out the letters. According to the assessment, he is able to read independent words at about a 5th grade level.
- Comprehension is the area that I would like to focus more on. When our buddy read from his own text book, he had a hard time retelling the story. It seemed he was more concerned with reading than comprehension. He had to go back to the text often and re-read to recall events. However, this student was aware of words that were unfamiliar to him. When we read a book of our choosing, Goosebumps, which is at about a fourth grade reading level, he said the text was too easy. And he was able to retell a good share of the details. When we read "Amelia Earhart", this student was able to recall some events in his own words; however, when we asked him the questions that were pre-written, our buddy had difficulty. From this assessment, he was at the frustration level and at the twenty-fifth percentile in fluency rate (2006 Hasbrouch & Tindal Oral Reading Fluency Data). This assessment was surprising to my partner and I because during our other sessions, his rate in regards to fluency was fine. Our buddy did not have any background knowledge on Earhart and did not seem to have an interest in the story.

As a result of this knowledge, what learning objectives and materials are you considering using for your lesson?

I would like to focus the next lesson on comprehension strategies. Is he making mental images in his head as he reads? Is he able to use background knowledge? Is he able to ask questions as he reads? Is he aware when things do not make sense when he reads? I think explicitly sharing one or two of these types of strategies will help in his reading comprehension because this student does have the ability to read fluently with out many miscues and self monitor. For materials, I would like to find a book he would enjoy reading about (i.e. fast cars, football) and a text that is still at fourth grade reading level. The learning objective would be focusing on one of these strategies to improve cognitive awareness of meaning in text.

Project 1 – Analysis of Student Writing and Lesson Plan, Comments from Peers, and Final Reflection

Overview
This student’s writing piece is in response to a prompt about finding a bottle with a rolled up piece of paper inside and then telling a story about what happens next. The student has put some thought and good detail in the story describing his feelings of enthusiasm when he finds the bottle and also adds his best friend’s name into the story showing a personal touch. There is an introductory setting of a very hot day on a sandy beach, and intrigue with the idea of a treasure map. Certain elements happen in the story leaving the reader wondering, why? However, with more additional clarity and build up in the middle section of the story, it is a great start to an eventual ending which includes discovering sixty grand and a purchase of a Lamborghini.

6 Trait Assessment (NWREL, 1992)
(1) Ideas: Support is attempted, but doesn’t go far enough yet in fleshing out the key issues or story line. The reader is left with questions. More information is needed to “fill in the blanks.” After the author and his friend discover a treasure map in the bottle, the author then writes, “then we got scared and whined like we were 2 months old…” The reader is left wondering what happened that they would be scared. The idea of feeling frightened was a great emotional addition but support was lacking. The treasure map was leading them to money, but details and the adventure in the journey was missing.
(2) Organization: The paper has a recognizable introduction and conclusion. Transitions sometime work, at other times, connections between ideas are unclear. Pacing is fairly well controlled, though the writer sometimes lunges ahead too quickly or spends too much time on details that did not seem pertinent to the story. “And” and “there was” is used frequently for transitions; however, the student does show awareness of organizational flow with the use of “then” and “next.” In the middle section, the student adds a paragraph about him and his best friend getting a bite, not feeling good, “drunk” some milk, and falling asleep. This detail could have been eliminated. Instead more aspects of what was on the treasure map could have been added.
(3 & 4) Voice/Word Choice: The writer does connect to the audience through the use of natural engaging language. The writer does take risk by the inclusion of personal detail that reveals the person behind the words. Striking words or phrases often catch the reader’s eye and linger in the reader’s mind. While the student can elaborate better on ideas and edit some sentences for print instead of talking, the voice of the author shows strong potential. Here are some examples:
- “…I wake up to find Im like burning hot like Id be in a oven at 200 degrese…”
- “…help me open this dum bottle…”
- “… whined like we were 2 months old.”
- “…lead me to 60 grand I was happy that I bought a lubergini and I still rember the day I found a bottle in the sandy beach.”
(5 & 6) Sentence Fluency and Conventions: More work will be needed in sentence fluency and conventions to make it easier on the reader to keep track of the message. Parts of the text invite expressive oral reading; but many sentences without proper conventions ramble on. Punctuation is often missing and the reader must read once to decode, then again for meaning. Commas, periods, and even exclamations will add to voice and fluency. Some word choice: “and” for transitions, “there was”, and “like” were repetitive. There were also some verb tense issues: “wake” instead of woke and “drunk” instead of drank.

Spelling
Misspelled words included: alomost, dwn, latter (later), roolled (rolled), peice, boottle (bottle), awesme, coul (cool), dwn, opend, dum (dumb), figuerd, fel, checkd, wonderd, and labergini. The writer is sounding out words to help aid in his spelling. Words ending in
“ed,” long vowel, other vowel patterns, consonant doubling, inflected endings, and syllable junctures are learning targets of focus. I would place this writer in the Within Word Pattern and Syllables and Affixes spelling stages (Bear & Templeton, 2004).

Summary
This writer has a clear introduction and conclusion. Elaboration of ideas in the middle will add to meat of the narrative. In addition, taking out some unnecessary detail will help the fluency for the reader. The writer shows potential for strong voice with the use of his descriptions and ideas. Lack of proper conventions is limiting the fluidity of this writing piece. More detail on the “why” part for sentence meaning will help the audience understand. I would recommend a conference discussing organization, elaboration and/or focus on ideas, sentence fluency, and conventions for learning and growth in writing.

Lesson Outline

Objective: Student will learn to organize, edit, and elaborate on ideas. We will be asking the questions: who, what, where, when, and why. A specific focus will be in answering the question, “Why is this happening in the story?”

Standards: GLE 1.3.1: Revises text, including changing words, sentences, paragraphs, and ideas.

Materials: Notebook paper and a pencil

Instructional Strategies:
This lesson will occur in a personal writing conference.

First I will ask the student to read his story aloud and tell me what he thinks so far.

I will then tell the student all the excellent ideas and thoughts on his paper already. (Celebrate student's writing from Routman, 2005)

Then I will remind him to keep his audience in mind and ask him if there is anything he thinks that will help the reader follow along with the story. I will also ask him if he thinks there is anything detail we should take out. I will take notes on the notebook paper of the ideas we discussed.

Then I will touch base on the elements of: who, what, where, when, and why. The focus will on the “why” part. For example, as a reader, I want to know what is scary, and why is it so hot, what is on the map, and why do you buy a Lamborghini?

After discussion, I will have this student work independently to make edits and add additional detail to add to his already wonderful start. The thoughts we discussed and notes taken will be given to him for reminders.

The next day, I will follow up with another conference. We will revisit his work to see if edits of elaboration were made and how he felt about his story now. Then together, we will discuss the next phase which if ready, will be a look at conventions.

Assessment:
I will compare first and second drafts and see if his ideas were expanded on and if as a reader I come away with fewer questions. I will also assess his new draft with the Six Traits Rubric with a focus on ideas.